Writing for Memory’s Sake

(Kimberly (she/her) took the express train down the fountain pen/stationery rabbit hole and doesn't want to be rescued. She can be found on Instagram @allthehobbies because there really are many, many hobbies!.)

(Content warning: Memory loss, dementia.)

When things get rough and I’m having a tough time processing what life is throwing at me, I often retreat to my desk and plunge myself into pens, writing, swatching, etc. It wasn’t intentional, but I actually wrote about taking solace in pens one year ago this week. This year, the trigger was seeing family this past weekend and finding out how badly some of their memory skills had deteriorated since I last saw them.

In the past year, my older sister was diagnosed with early-onset dementia. She struggles to get through the day because she is constantly forgetting things. She still knows people and has memories from the past but her short-term memory isn’t really there. Cooking is now a danger because she would step away and forget that she was cooking and just leave the stove on. She has to write everything down, but (1) often forgets what she’s trying to say while she’s still writing, (2) she doesn’t remember where she puts her notebook, and (3) then forgets to check it regularly.

And then there’s my mom who is in her mid-80s so memory loss is somewhat expected, though I know folks who were well into their 90s and still sharp as a tack. During the 45 minute drive to my niece’s wedding, every few minutes my mom asked me about a dozen times how many kids I have, what grade he’s in, and whether he’s in high school. And even though we kept telling her, she wasn’t able to remember that she was going to my niece’s wedding and that we would be staying at the hotel. Because of this faulty memory, she kept “escaping” to find a way home because she didn’t know where she was. In fact, she actually left her room when everyone was still asleep and was missing for a while (thankfully, we found her in the lobby where she was hoping she could ask someone she recognized to take her home).

Why am I telling you all this?

Because this whole experience has really shaken me to my core. It is a glimpse into my potential future. Will I also suffer such significant memory loss? Will my family have to deal with the repetitious questions from me? And yes, I even wonder if I will remember what my favorite pens are. Honestly, I don’t know. But a quick Google search brings up articles and studies that show the positive effects that writing things down has on memory and brain function, and that gives me a glimmer of hope.

This time, it’s more than just taking comfort in my pens. I feel a sense of urgency, a bit of desperation but also renewed energy to write more. Things I want to remember about the mundane and exciting things in life, about baseball games, travel, food and yes, pens too. New Italian words and grammar concepts (while shaking a fist at past imperfect tense!) or places I want to visit. Favorite song lyrics, transcribing books, quotes, letters to pen pals - there’s never a shortage of things to write.

Short daily notes in my Traveler’s Notebook coupled with weekly highlights/stories.

I update my Plotter before I travel (to SoCal this weekend) so I can check out new places.

Despite only being 43% done, transcribing Marcus Aurelius’ Meditations has been and continues to be a source of relaxation and calm (which are also important for healthy brain function) as I practice writing in typewriter font.

Copying an Italian grammar book a few weeks after I’ve learned a concept helps me understand and retain the information better than just reading the book or rote memorization.

I don’t know what my future holds, but I will continue to write as much as possible, so I can strengthen my memory via my writing habit, so even if I become forgetful some day, I’ll still be able to read and remember. Whether or not you are going through a similar struggle, I hope writing with your pens brings you a little peace and comfort in your life. Take care of yourself, hang in there, and hug your loved ones just a little bit tighter.

Another Writing Retreat in the Books (Literally)

(Sarah Read is an author, editor, yarn artist, and pen/paper/ink addict. You can find more about her at her website and on Twitter. And check out her latest book, Out of Water, now available where books are sold!)

Memorial Day weekend is always my busiest writing time. As a horror writer, everything is scheduled to come out around Halloween, which means everything is due by June. Sometimes I spend the weekend hiding at the lake and writing, and sometimes I spend it at a convention in Madison. This year I attended the convention, though I hid and wrote most of the time.

I usually set myself a minimalistic travel goal. But when you're running on four deadlines, maximalism rules. There was no thoughtful process about which pen to bring. Is it inked? Bring it! Oh, you're writing stories in three different notebooks? Bring them all! And you have to type them and turn them in??? Better bring the computer! I usually travel with a backpack only for any amount of time, but this trip took three bags, and it was only three days. Granted, I had to have a ballgown and heels with me, but still. I also adopted a small cactus on the first day of my trip, which added an interesting daily carry challenge that I did not anticipate.

My clothes and toiletries traveled in my Tom Bihn Tri-Star; my computer, tech, and heels were in the Tom Bihn Swift; and my daily carry, including all writing gear, was the Tom Bihn Parental Unit. The Tri-Star is usually all I need, with the addition of a sling to use as a purse. But the Parental Unit is 99.99% the perfect bag for me. If it had an external grab handle, it would be unbeatable. The internal organization makes my heart sing, and it never fails to amaze me how much I can fit into it while not feeling overburdened. It's the most carried bag I own. For daily use, I just don't zip it, and make use of the inexplicably placed interior grab handles. I need it zipped when I travel, though, so it drove me a little nuts on this trip.

For my most-used writing gear, I defaulted to my Hobonichi Cousin. I'm terrible at using the daily pages for daily things, so I use the unused daily pages as rough draft pages. It works out to be the perfect system for me, as I have the monthly and weekly planner pages that I use all the time, and then the rest is essentially a regular notebook, which I always need to have with me anyway. The pen I reached for most was my Hardy Penwrights that I got at the Chicago Pen Show a few weeks ago. Granted, it was so pretty it distracted me and inspired a whole pen glamour-shot photoshoot for later blog use, and it even distracted some nearby writers who have now been penabled. It happens.

I also spent a good amount of time drafting in my Seven Seas Writer, and for that I used my Sailor 4am that I reviewed last week. Most of the rest of my writing was done on the computer. Alas.

To carry my precious pens safely, I used a Rickshaw Bagworks case I got from Carolina Pen Company--their Unicorn Autopsy design. Inside that I have a three-pen Rickshaw sleeve, a two-pen Rickshaw sleeve, and two single-pen Rickshaw sleeves. I'm a fan.

Get to work!!!

Overall, it was a lot to carry, and I didn't use it all, because I didn't hit all my deadlines. I'm still working on it! I hit the road again in a week, for another author conference. I'm going more minimal this time--though I still need the ballgown and heels. And I'm taking a train halfway across the country, so I'm hoping for some chill writing time. I'm bringing two fountain pens (a Schon DSGN pocket pen and a Kaweco Liliput), two non-fountain pens (a Spoke Roady and a Pen Type-B), and two notebooks (my Hobonichi and the Plotter Mini). That doesn't sound too minimal when I list it all out, but who needs clothes when you can pack stationery? I'll just wear the gown every day.

---

Enjoy reading The Pen Addict? Then consider becoming a member to receive additional weekly content, giveaways, and discounts in The Pen Addict shop. Plus, you support me and the site directly, for which I am very grateful.

Membership starts at just $5/month, with a discounted annual option available. To find out more about membership click here and join us!

InCoWriMo, AKA International Correspondence Writing Month

(Kimberly (she/her) took the express train down the fountain pen/stationery rabbit hole and doesn't want to be rescued. She can be found on Instagram @allthehobbies because there really are many, many hobbies!.)

I know that it’s already a few days into February but did you know that February is a month that celebrates letter writing?! International Correspondence Writing Month, or InCoWriMo for short, is basically a month-long opportunity for folks to hand-write and mail something every day.

The idea of InCoWriMo was born 10 years ago on January 25, 2013, with the first InCoWriMo in February 2013, so this is going to be the 11th InCoWriMo with people from all over the world writing notes to each other! There are more details on the InCoWriMo website, but people basically try to write and mail one letter/note/postcard every day of the month. And if you can’t do it every day, that’s ok too! It’s just a great way to connect with folks via mail as well as catching up on reply piles (yes, that’s directed at me, lol).

Who am I gonna write to?

There is an InCoWriMo address exchange if you want to share your address. Note that since you are commenting with your address on the page, it is available for people to see. I am not a member of the website and I’m able to see addresses, so if privacy is a concern, read on for other options.

If you are in any pen or stationery (or other) enthusiast groups, whether on Facebook, Slack, Discord, etc., you may want to search for snail mail channels, groups, etc. If you are on the Pen Addict Slack, there is a #snailmail channel. There is also a fountain pen penpal group on Facebook called Fountain Pen Friends where I’m one of the moderators. I actually started my penpal journey in that group 5+ years ago and have since added more from the PA Slack. There are also groups like PostCrossing that connect folks who want to swap postcards too.

If you are not in any groups, or you’re uncomfortable with sharing your address with strangers, you can always start with friends and family. Maybe folks on your holiday card list, or folks that send cards to you that you might want to check in on, or people you haven’t talked to since your graduation, last job, wedding, Vegas trip, etc. Don’t forget vendors and businesses that you interact with (and presumably like, lol)! In short, pretty sure everyone likes to get happy mail that isn’t spam, ads and bills!

What do I need to write?

A writing instrument (pen of any kind, but you know me, I’m gonna use fountain pens for my letters), paper, an envelope and stamps. You can also use postcards if the thought of writing a letter or card is too daunting. Check your local postal service for prices on stamps, but in the US, a “forever” stamp costs $0.60 and is good for sending up to a one ounce letter anywhere in the US. For most people that’s plenty; even for a long-winded person like myself, I rarely need two stamps. The cost to mail to international destinations is $1.65 per ounce. You can also send a postcard for $0.44. Pro tip: “Forever” stamps are worth the current value regardless of how much it was worth when you bought them. So stamps from 2018 cost $0.50 but are worth $0.60 now. If you plan on doing more letter writing, it’s worth buying extras, especially if a price hike is coming up (the most recent one took effect a couple weeks ago). Forever stamps exist for regular mail, postcard and international mail.

You don’t have to be a philatelist (aka, stamp collector) to get started with letter writing.

What am I supposed to say?

You can write about anything but if you are stuck, you can go with something simple like this:

• Greeting - “Hi there!”, “Dear B-rad”, “Hello Grandma!!” - however you want to greet the recipient!
• Introduction - You might want to mention why you’re writing - “I’m doing a crazy thing this month by handwriting letters throughout the month of February. How are you?” If you’re writing to a stranger, or someone you don’t know well, you could also include a short intro about yourself - “I’m Kimberly and I’m writing to you from sunny California, where the temperature is currently 54 degrees”.
• Any other info - You can let friends know what you’ve been up to recently or tell new friends a little more about you, like your hobbies or family. “I’m married with a 12 year old son who is currently in middle school and likes video games. In addition to pens, I enjoy running, knitting and reading.”
• Closing - “Yours truly”, “All the best”, “Take Care”, etc. are simple ways to end a note.
• Signature - make it legible so they know who it’s from :-)

Recipients will be thrilled to get snail mail, so try not to sweat it too much. And if that feels like too much, a postcard is great because you can just say hi and talk about the postcard and wish them a nice day.

If writing a letter seems too daunting, a postcard is a great option! I always end up buying more postcards than I send out - time to fix that!

”Dear Bossman…”

Miscellaneous tips

• If you just want to send a note without getting a letter in return, you should mention that so you don’t end up with a whole slew of new penpals or have your recipient feel pressured to reply.
• If it is super rainy (like the recent atmospheric river storms in my neck of the woods), consider using permanent ink on your envelopes (there are waterproof fountain pen inks as well as other options like Sharpie, rollerball, etc.)
• I store envelopes, stamps and stickers in an A5 pouch which I keep in my purse along with my letters and paper so I can work on a letter whenever I want.
• You don’t have to keep letters that you receive, nor do you have to take notes about what you wrote (or what they wrote). You don’t have to scan your letters before you send them (though it’s not a bad idea if you’re sending a 40 page novella like I once did, lol). I treat letters like conversations - I don’t take notes when I talk to my friends and yes, that may mean I retell stories or get details mixed up, but that’s ok!
• Make sure your name and address is on the envelope (preferably in the upper left corner on the same side as the recipient address), in case the recipient has moved or if they want to write back. Pro tip: If you donate to charities, eventually you will get plenty of address labels! I haven’t bought address labels since I moved nearly 15 years ago!

Since we are Pen Addicts here, I wanted to share some fountain-pen friendly options as well as other things you can do if you want to be a little “extra”. You can get started with any pen, any paper and any envelope, so don’t let lack of these items hold you back!

Paper

• There are looseleaf, pad and perforated versions of Tomoe River, Cosmo Air Light, Midori Paper, Rhodia, Clairefontaine, Ayush, Black n Red (or Optik Paper in Europe) and other fountain pen-friendly papers.
• You can also find fp-friendly envelopes from Clairefontaine, Midori and others.
• You can also get letter sets or card sets with matching envelopes. Midori makes many cute options. Peter Pauper Press (which you can find at Barnes and Noble stores as well as on Amazon and other line retailers) have a good selection of sets, and while the paper is generally fp-friendly, their envelopes are hit and miss (especially the coated ones which are definitely NOT useable with FPs).

Clockwise from left: Italian stationery kit, Clairefontaine Triomphe, Midori Cat letter set, G Lalo paper/envelopes, Unicorn card set from Peter Pauper Press.

Make your own envelope

• You can use an envelope maker like this envelope maker (affiliate link) and some heavier paper/cardstock to make your own envelopes. You can reuse paper from old wall calendars or thicker scrapbook paper. Just be sure that the creases won’t break easily (which is what happened when I tried using wrapping paper) and that the seams are glued/taped well. You can put a white label on it for the recipient’s address.

Envelope decoration

• Washi tape - This is a really simple way to decorate your envelope! It is perfect for not-very-creative people like me!

Plain and simple gets the job done, right, Mr. Downdly? 🙂

A little bit of washi adds a nice touch

• Stickers - Another super easy option for envelope decoration, stickers are an inexpensive way to spruce up your envelope. You can even reuse free stickers from vendor packages or Trader Joes, or get inexpensive stickers from the dollar store.

• Rubber Stamps - Another rabbit hole is that of rubber stamps! You can even get snail mail-themed stamps!

It’s fun picking random stamps to fill in the gaps.

You can put stickers and stamps on the front too!

• Wax seals - This is a neat way to literally seal an envelope! Some post offices will tell you that it needs extra postage, while others don’t have that restriction, so it’s best to add another stamp just in case. Also, depending on the wax and the location of the seal (e.g. if it is closer to the sorting machine rollers, etc.), the seal might not make it fully intact, but it’s usually mostly good! You can get wax and wax seals from shops like Vanness, Papier Plume as well as Amazon and Etsy.

Melting some wax beads (be sure to do this in an area without flammables nearby.)

Probably could’ve used a wee bit more wax but it turned out alright!

This seal is from one of my penpals and it survived the journey to my mailbox!

Having the opportunity to slow down and have written conversations with friends from all over is such a treasure in this hustle and bustle world. Whether you decided to jump into InCoWriMo and write 28 letters in 28 days or you just want to write a few postcards, I hope you give it a try. Good luck and happy writing!